alrighty. today i planned to go home early.
but.....i ended up at linxin's house.
along with ella and mujia.
guess it was very much of slacking around, chilling out.
but it was time well spent.
much laughter.
but i got hold of things i din intend to know.
test of tolerance.
overcome it inezlau. nods-
IM PROUD OF MY FLICHU!
let the Shepherd lead the way. leave it all unto Him.
i love you my girl.
and you're a special gift in my life.

back's hurting.
ppl ard me aint feeling too good.
HUGS- comeon, give me a smile.
i wna be a HERMIT CRAB.
that's random.

end it all off, I LOVE ALL ARD ME (: nods-

the greatest Love that anyone could ever know.
it overcame the cross and grave to find my soul.

grins-
that song made me smile.
im feeling drained. bahh.
physics test was generally alright.
although i lost four marks.
left it into His hands.
thank God for flichu, we prayed tgt. hee (:

band, surprisingly it was FUN.
i told Daddy to tide me thru the band prac.
and He made it fun and lovely.
although my butt hurts now. hahas.
M'SIA, here i come, to conquer SHOPPING MALLS!
yaye! shopping spree! (:

it's amazing how i ever managed to pass these few days.
they have been horribly long.
and classes have been .... times that i stone.
thank God for all the moments of assurance.


let the pinwheel of happiness turn.

today was the first day of school.
it was .... commentless.
hahs. english, amaths and phy were bad.
not cos of anything particular la.

after school, got to spend time with flichu.
silly me thought that i had my wallet in class.
THEN after going BACK to school,
i realised it was in my bag all along.
bahh.
but me and flichu saw smth good out of it.
i got reminded of stuffs and shared with her. (:

went marina square to shop.
hohohs. she ended up not buying her stuffs again.
except for a MANGO shirt.
lalalalas. i love sales.
i got a white knee length skirt (:

flichu is nice to talk to. we've been thru it babe.
she just got herself a breakthrough (:
im happy for her.
we've seen history repeating itself ard us.
the history in our lives repeated on others.

we'l need support from each other!
no, one another. plus jer and lydia (:
and more to come.
thank God for all of them.
i've found my issac. now, time to lift it up.
my nana was lovely today too.
THANK YOU MAID =D
many brightened my day today.
i was going ard, im so tired.
and i couldnt balance. =x

thank You for helping me identify my test.
at least, i know where im heading now.
giving thanks and rejoicing now.

BEAMS- GRINS- SMILES- LAUGHS-
all mine today i dont care (:
cos im happy happy happy.
although i moodswinged a lil just now.
im a happy lil girl staring at the Throne, in awe.
He's Almighty.
He's great.
He's my Love <3
there's just no one who can make me so happy.

special one,
im glad to have you back in my life too (:
the reason why we drifted, im no longer interested.
what matters most, i've got back my friend.
my long lost friend.
im thankful that this thing is solved.
and i really thank God, it's a load off me. =D
i know i still have unsolved problems.
but HEY, what's too difficult for my Dad man (:


headache is bugging me now.
ther's something still bugging me.
nevermind. it'l be solved soon enough.
i lift it all up to You.

<3 all those who made me smile today.

i wished there was a way to explain how i feel now.
the complex interior feeling.
i sat by the window just now,
and tears came by to visit.
but then when my ipod played worship songs.
i began to (:
hohos. this proves it !
nothing can take away the joy the Lord has given me.

satan, give it up (:
pain can overwhelm, but joy will always be there.
this reminds me of secret partner.
she and her naming of her kids. =x

yesterday talked to flichu.
two of us bounced out of pp way LIKE KIDS.
hahahs. i love her la.
i love all those who went out with me ytd.
tiffany, lydia, flichu, jer, qian.
lovely company. they caught all my laughter.
OOHS and POCKY too (:

elmo's flat by now. but there's pocky!
and Daddy! grins-

my post seems happy.
so be it.

this hurts.

ytd was the day one of the chinese course.
i guess it was rather interesting and all.
but im not there for the second day
.COS IM SICK ):
like again.

the details bout yesterday i dont feel like blogging.
cos, i guess i din really felt too good yesterday.
but beach was fun (:
had much laughter with all of them.

came home and headache bothered me.
and was down with fever.
zui ai called from camp.
they seemed to be having fun.
hahas. hairband and all.
flichu has an interesting cousin. xP
darling, thanks for brightening my night with your call.
i miss my doctor la. pouts very hard-
but i hope she'l have fun at camp (:

off to chiong homework now.
Daddy, multiply my time.

had a long talk with Daddy on father's day ytd.
considered as ytd since it's after 12.
i guess He's the only one who will be there throughout.
even when all the other 'iloveyou's fail me,
at least i know there's one that i can depend on.

i realise something,
i've been really closing up alot.
my inner emotions, i keep within.
it's not much of a choice. but... i dont know.
this line popped up in my head,
'becos of you, i dont know how to let anyone else in,
becos of you, im afraid.'

my heart feels ... twisted.
im not doing anything, just sitting here.
and yet the feeling refuses to leave.

suting's nick long time ago came to mind.
'if standing doesnt work, try kneeling.'
my King, my Saviour, my Love, my Best friend, my Life,
my Everything.
off to get the nagging feeling off my chest.
gdbye.

freak la. i dont know what to do alr la.
ughskjdoisjrdfkwdghiojdfgeopidflkqasd
freaking shit. rahh rahh rahh.
JUST WHEN MY DAY WAS ABT TO END.
-

freak la. i dont know what to do alr la.
ughskjdoisjrdfkwdghiojdfgeopidflkqasd
freaking shit. rahh rahh rahh.
JUST WHEN MY DAY WAS ABT TO END.
-

yesterday was a fun day out to the airport.
had lunch with mummy first.
before rushing off to the airport. with a hurting back & stomach.
met mummy, chongwu, mujia, yanhui.
walked around before walking to the belt.

AND FINALLY!
and see all my lovelys coming out.
lin xin! celeste! su ting!
=DD i missed them so badly la.
hugs after hugs. and i got a kiss from baby daughter.

went to sakae sushi for dinner.
lovely dining time with all of them.
four RED plates of salmon sashimi.
irresistable la.
i din get to eat my YAM mochi icecream.
but i got MINT instead. (:

bought a bouquet of pink roses for baby daughter.
and her parents sent me to aljunied mrt.
i miss her alr. ):


night time was .....
zui ai, i hold on to our promise.
that is a promise i wont ever break.
my heartfelt words, i love you.

chongwu! thanks for all the lovely msges.
at least i wasnt alone at 3am (:

secret partner. silly argentina fan.
im still sorry for not showing my joyous side for a day.

silly malay ahbeng.
thanks for your msges. you werent feeling too good too.
but still msged me during your break.
SMILE alrights. (:

aint feeling too good now.
rahh gahh bahh aahh.
"you locked yourself in, and locked me out."
the lock wasnt impose by me.

i dont feel like talking anymore.

today yesterday was a good day.
lovely day out with my secret partner.
went shopping at bugis.
bought two longggg skirts. orange and green!
and two tees. =D
and one necklace/bracelet.
prettaye! i was zilian-ing all the way.

talked pretty much with secret partner.
and realised we've the same thinking.
(: and heard loads abt her trip to cheenaland.
i simply love this girl of mine. =D

headed down to suntec to meet zui ai.
shopped around and laughed around.
but it was lesser talking.
lovely zui ai bought my ribena pastils for me. (:
GRINS- one craving settled.
still have, YAM mochi icecream.
prata with chocolate icecream.
carrot cake.
DURIAN. many more....

ohwells. satisfy ALL my cravings. (:
find me cookie monster balloon.
that's someone else's craving i wna satisfy. =D


my elmo balloon is deflating. ):
my stomach's churning for no reason.
my back's hurting.
WHERE'S MY DOCTOR? ):

i miss ruffling someone to sleep.

i choose not to trust anymore.

i realise what i do when im asleep amazes me.
first it was the vampire dream.
that got zui ai laughing so badly.
then it is now, the singing in my dreams.

MY COUSIN CLAIMS I SING WHEN IM ASLEEP.
that's ...... amazing aint it?
HOHOHOS. (:
but she forgot what song i sing. =x
and ppl says that im comfortable to sleep on.
who said that? some PIG that fell asleep on me so MANY times.
shakeshead-

today's morning was rather bad i guess.
almost screamed at zui ai. =x
almost. but din. (:
by now, everything's sorted out.
thank You Daddy.

bitterness all gone, forgiveness came in.
thank You Jesus.

i wna be your moon.
the one i told this to will know. (:

waves of mercy waves of grace.
everywhere i look, i see Your face.
Your love has captured me.
oh my God this love how can it be.
nananan~~~

this song brings back many joyful memories. (:
those times of childlike faith.
Daddy, restore my childlike faith.
that i'l do as You say.
times like these i want them to last.
forever is only possible with You around.

friendships built with my sisters-in-Christ will last,
forever! =D
my family, my home, my comfort.

today was a great day out.
Daddy, i love you for who you are. (:
nothing will be able to take away the joy you give me.
nothing. =D

kids see things the way we dont.
and im thankful for those kids ard.
jabez said,
i know Daddy's there but now, i need someone physical to be there.
i've to agree.
daddy, i know you'l always be there for me.
but it's times like these when i need someone to just be there.
someone physical.
im sure daddy understands.
that's why friends are all around us.

after service and all, went out with zui ai.
it was a funny day out.
all my random cravings and stuffs.
im sorry darling, im one who keeps quiet when i swing.
x( and you're one of the victims.

i told her abt my vampire dream.
and i got her laughing until she almost rolled on the floor.
i cant help it that i got funny dreams right? ):

zui ai, thanks for everything.
all those attempts to make me smile today.
hee. i did smile in the end din i?
you're my prettiest, hottest, shuaiest.
haiyo, that sounded wrong. ohwells.
you know what i mean. (: love!

mummy, thank you for all that you've done too.
just by being there. i appreciate it.
xiaobai too. (: you were great.
what are daughters for? (:
FOR ME TO LOVE.

CHARLOTTE IS BACK!!
finally, after all my pining and whining.
my secret partner is finally back. (:
just wna let you know, i missed you ALOT.
and will continue missing you till i see you again.
=D

it's a happy day out with my love.
the unhappy, you wont see.

have been reading my previous posts.
they brought a smile to my face.
those days were so good.
those days were so innocent.
those days were so happy.
those days ... are gone.

these few days haven been very good i guess.
or perhaps it's just me.
heartbreaks last as long as you want it to.
pain cuts as deeply as you allow it to.
shrugs-

mummy's tag made me think.
theTENofus. since when did the TEN became nine?
my comfort zone. <3
they never fail to go crazy with me.
never fail to bring a smile to my face.
even if chalet is just talking, we stayed close.
but one brought me nth but pain.
everything aint going really well now.
i wished there could be words to describe how i feel.
at least then i can shout it all out.
but sadly there isnt.

someday when you finally realise,
i would have become another face in the crowd.
nth more but a face in the crowd.


elmo knows it all. Daddy too.

070606
it was a rushing day for me.
went to watch she's the man with zui ai.
SHE HAS A BOTTOMLESS PIT LA.
for a stomach. hahas. stupid person.
i din even finish my food and she wanted MORE.
haiyo.

we were laughing like idiots in the cinema.
i guess the show was rather good.
at least it got the both pigs laughing like mad.
then we rushed down to punggol.
FOR KIDS CAMP!
kids were really high and crazy.
i love them eh. ((: super cute.

then rushed down to the chalet.
tonned at the pool side. listening to worship songs.
looking at the stars.
i did sleep in the end but things haunted me.
tears fell.

080606
slept the day away.
and went down to meet jer they all.
watched the dancers.
met mummy malia xiaohui xiaobai pet there.
ended up having dinner with them.
AND I HAD MY ELMO BALLOON! (:
all thanks to mummy. =D


end of my happy days.

today was a great day out with my loved ones.
flichu, tiffany, jeralyn, lydia.
we managed to catch up quite a lot.
went out after band with those babes.
walked around, shopped around and ate around.
HAHAS. pigs.

was at town at first.
then lydia and flichu went off,
so me, tiff and jer went down to bugis.
SHOPPING TIME.
i spend money like water. i ought to CONTROL.
but it was long since i pampered myself.
HAHAS. stupid malay ahbeng came down.
AND BULLIED ME LA. ):
was pouting the whole way thru.
ohwells. i've moodswings like a three-yr-old.

all my lovelys were great today.
flichu, a sister i missed so badly.
this time, i'l cheer you on. (:
let the passion for Him never die =D

lydia, my laupo who is ever so flirtatious.
but she's ohso adorable in her siao actions.

tiffany, MY MANYU! (:
i miss you so badly la. and today we shopped again.
yaye. i bet you love my decisiveness ALOT. =D

jer, the one i drifted from but i know you're always there.
you never fail to show me frm another pt of view.
make me realise things i never realise before. (:
thanks babe. <3

hqy, stupid ahbeng.
keep bullying me. but her spas laughter is funny.
HEH. you're an airport runway la! =D


lovely day out.
i never thought this combi can go out tgt.
but we fit perfectly fine. (:
it's time that we got closer to each other.
I LOVE MY LOVELIES ALOT. <3

thank you Jesus, my comfort. (:
thank you girlfriend, my moon. (:
thank you zanne, the man. (:
thank you secret partner, my dearest. (:
thank you nikita, my table partner. (:
my heartbreaker, thank you too.

That was how heaven had extinguished our only flame of hope.
But now? Even you turned your back on me
and left me alone in the dark to rot and drown in my sorrows.
Your last touch, is the memorial of our past.

Return me the key to my heart,
which you so heartlessly stole.
Come back to me,
don't you know how much i missed you so?

saw these lyrics on secret partner's blog.
it makes alot of sense. brings forth pain too.
perhaps, it's time to drift away.


chalet was good. it was fun.
questions were asked and being answered.
thank God for all those He placed in my life.
all my mentors. and all my beloveds.
this family, i wont ever leave.

and i've gotten myself a pig who sleeps on my lap.
and is scarey cos she wakes up in the middle of the night.
and talks for one min, then falls back aslp.
SHE DIN REMEMBER ANYTHING AFTER THAT.
goodness. >< i slept at 6 in the morning and woke up at 8+ wooosh.

we bonded. we talked. we got closer. all as a family.
but somehow, im losing this communication.
shrugs- i can talk about any other thing.
but when it comes to inner feelings, im sorry.
perhaps if ppl waited for a lil longer, was there a lil longer,
it would come out. but -
becos you're close to heart, that's why it pains me so.
tears shed alone.